How to spot a hipster

krappyrubsnif

I'm going for a drink in Islington next week in some place that my friend has warned me is full of hipsters. I need to know how to dress, what to drink etc. I understand narrow fitting Jeans and a beard are required. Also I need to cultivate a taste for craft microbrewery foreign lager and be aged around 20-30. And tips on attitude and outlook on life to adopt also appreciated. Any further advice about how to fit in?

Toddlesocks

By my observations in the worlds end, talk loudly, laugh loudly and waive your arms around in an animated fashion,

krappyrubsnif

I am apt to do that already, especially after a couple of drinks (not necessarily craft lager).

TheMimsy

You need big, black rimmed  glasses, like the 3D cinema ones.<div>Report back on the night out!</div>

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krappyrubsnif

3-D glasses - check. The dress sounds lovely but Mrs K is not coming. We are two blokes.

Stella

Arrive on a fixie and wear a shoulder bag.<br>

NorthNineteen

Either cycle there on a fixie or if that's not possible at least try to mention you have a fixie.<br><br>You need to hate anything mainstream or deemed too corporate.<br><br>If you mention you make you sell your own olive oil you will be accepted quickly.<br><br><br>

NorthNineteen

This should give a bit of an introduction:<br><br>

krappyrubsnif

Off to the bike shop. Is olive oil hipster? Cool!

NorthNineteen

Olive oil itself maybe not, but the idea of producing it and marketing it as hyper-local is pretty hipster.<br>

Stella

NorthNineteen. That's hilarious. Quite funny, I've met so many people who aren't fans of hipsters, yet the only ones oblivious to their being unliked are the hipsters themselves. I know a few I get on with as they're just nice people caught up in the trend but, in general, I'll avoid them.<br>

Toddlesocks

Going by a few boater hipsters who have hooked up with me on facebook your name needs tweaking a bit.<div><br></div><div>They either just use  first name with area they come from if being cool and understating, or if being flash add a descriptive to their name .</div><div><br></div><div>suggestions</div><div><br></div><div>Krappy Stroud Green</div><div> Olive king, krappyrubsnif  Extraordinaire</div><div><br><div> </div></div>

JoeV

This conversation brings me back to one my parents had circa 1983.

Detritus

They dress like tossers. They act like tossers. They sound like tossers. Frankly hipsters are tossers. As you can tell they are not my favourite people.

miss annie

I wouldn't write someone off immediately just because they are 'hipster'. It's a trend and they'll have moved on to something else in a year or so. There were some quite ridiculous and annoying trends when I was in my twenties too so we have to be tolerant of the youthful fads. Most people take the best of these trends with them and leave the sillier bits behind. If the current tribe of hipsters take their make do and mend and keep it local ethos with them as they move on then I think that's a good thing.

Sutent

Thats all a bit harsh. I know some lovely hipsters.

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Toddlesocks

<font face="Arial, Verdana" size="2">@ agree with miss annie</font><div style="font-family: Arial, Verdana; line-height: normal;"><font size="2"><br></font></div><div style="font-family: Arial, Verdana; line-height: normal;"><font size="2">They don't appear to be particularly  clannish like some past trends,  may get a raised eyebrow but never felt unwelcome among a crowd of them.</font></div><div style="font-size: 10pt;"><div style="font-family: Arial, Verdana; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal;"><br></div><div style="font-family: Arial, Verdana; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal;"><br></div></div>

Stella

I felt highly unwelcome between them when I worked as a gardener on the roof. They came with their laptops and iPhones, their cans (or bottles) of lager and looked me up and down, only the dismissive snort missing, when I came along to water the plants. They treated me as if I were some sort of lower being for having dirty fingernails and jeans. Excuse me, I'm the one who's making the garden pretty so you can enjoy it, I didn't know I should be known of, but not be seen. Wanker!<br>And I wasn't the only one who felt that way; the people working in that building (some of them hipsters themselves), were rather annoyed, too. What once was our retreat was now covered by a carpet of beards with glasses and moustaches. <br><br>Sorry, rant over. <br>

krappyrubsnif

This is great!     I'm getting it all together - might have a bit of trouble with the beard or moustache in time though.<br><br>What about hair?<br><br>I'm about ready for a visit to Vitor.<br>

Stella

Don't get a hair cut. The more shite you look on the head, the better. Messy and possibly a bit greasy, so don't go and wash your hair before you go.<br>

Toddlesocks

Maybe its me,  i can play up a little if pick up snobbery ie would maybe have picked some dirt out  fingernails flicked it  in the air, wiped hands on jeans then announced to them stand back or you could get wet! <div><br></div><div>Admittedly its something have developed the older i get, one of the things i like about being   a scatty  ol bag ( when dismissed as one)  . just find peoples snobbery highly amusing and pathetic, cant resist having a little fun with it. </div>

Stella

One of the other gardeners (she's 60) did that and had fun doing so, completely oblivious at the people shaking their heads at her. <br>I accidentally sprayed a bit of water (in the summer) at a girl who acted as if I'd dumped a bucket of water of her. Ridiculous. If I'd be visiting such a space and see that someone's trying to work and I'm in the way, I'd politely ask if I should move, or just do it when it's obvious that the person is dancing around me. Not so the hipster--oh, no. It's this kind of arrogance that gets to me. I hate arrogant people, hipsters or others. If you're going to have a shit, it stinks, so stop acting as if you're someone special. <br><br>Uh, I'm on fire today. <br>

Detritus

90% of the hipsters I see look like they could be from where's wally books. As miss annie pointed out they they are after the modern day grunge look. I was into grunge first time around and achieved that look by not washing, sleeping and occasional outside stimulus. No over priced coffee and a bike . And it might just be me but are nearly all male hipsters drainpipe thin? So my advice is act like a tosser, dress like a cartoon character, drink expensive coffee, become very thin, get glasses and try to stick your head up your own arse whilst riding a fixie

Stella

Maybe we're just a bunch of old tossers ourselves. I never was a hipster and never will be. I have to admit that I liked The Cure, The Smiths (still love the latter and get all nostalgic when I hear them being played somewhere), and wore the bottle green trousers and turtlenecks, even had the Sendra boots (have them again these days--complete with steel toe-caps and love 'em). Grunge went completely past me, I think it was the time when I was on my Oasis trip. <br>

krappyrubsnif

I can barely restrain my excitement, most of my acquaintances would probably say that I look like a tosser and act like a tosser already.    I think this could be for non-hipster reasons, however.<br>

Papa

Krappy, three tips<br><br>Make sure you roll your trouser legs up slightly. <br><br>Definitely mention the hyper local olive oil but always remember to refer to it being a start-up and that you've been crowdfunding it.<br><br>And get yourself a <a href="">Geek Pie haircut</a>. You can claim you're moving ahead of the herd that will jump on a forthcoming mid-2000s revival in the latter half of 2014.<br><br><br>

Detritus

I've discovered a deep loathing of hipsters I never thought I had.

Toddlesocks

For  the facial hair, could snip a few bits of fur off your new puppy , stick it to top lip and chin with pva glue, keep checking its not about to fall off  during the night by pretending to twiddle it.

krappyrubsnif

Should I take the puppy?  Is a puppy a hipster accessory?<br>