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Go off on one: This is why I hate Cristiano Ronaldo

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  1.  
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeMar 29th 2008
     

    Cheating Portuguese twat

    Just look at him. Smug twat.

    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     
    Great player, mind.
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     
    Hideous smug twat.
    • CommentAuthorSimonB
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     
    I hate smug ... but only when you've got nothing to be smug about ... I hate ManU but you can't dismiss Ronaldo as anything but genious
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     

    @ Colette. Thankyou!

    @ SimonB - that's the most frustrating thing about it. He is a brilliant player but I cannot stand watching him because he's so annoying. He is either doing the face above or this one:

    crying twat

    He looks like a three year old who has had a tantrum and rubbed its eyes with its fists until they have gone red (the eyes, that is).

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008 edited
     

    Bergkamp was closer to genious than Ronaldo will ever be, he's never played well against top defenders and is basically just fast. Can't argue with his goal tally though. All that said, footballers should never be referred to as genious. I love my football but its an insult to the word.

    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     
    @ Liz, thanks for that excellent photo of Ronaldo sobbing. It has made my day. I'm looking forward to him looking like that when Arsenal pip Man U to the premiership title this season (granted, this is not looking likely), or when they get knocked out of the Champions League in the next round (more likely).

    @ David, I'm not sure it's morally right to use the words Bergkamp and Ronaldo in the same sentence. But surely it is right to refer to the might Bergkamp as a footballing genius?
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     

    More likely he will look like that when Portugal lose in Euro 08 this summer. But then no English players will even have the opportunity to sob like babies in that tournament...

    • CommentAuthorTabbie
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     
    But don't you think he's quite fit, in a hispanic chav way?
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     

    OH MY GOD NO!

    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMar 30th 2008
     
    Fit?
    Well I suppose there's someone for everyone.
    Personally though I'd rather peel off my skin and roll around in a bath of salt than describe him as fit.
    • CommentAuthorPete
    • CommentTimeMar 31st 2008
     
    He's no Eric
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeMar 31st 2008
     

    @ Colette. That's an incredibily articulate explanation, which I wasn't able to muster when responding to Tabbie's comments last night. It's always good to know you're not alone!

    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeApr 1st 2008
     
    Another great goal. Brave player.
    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 1st 2008
     

    Brave? It was a free header. You sound worse than Tyldesley and that night in Barcelona.

    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeApr 1st 2008
     
    Ronaldo's pace what done it.

    And Clive tells it like it is

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 2nd 2008
     

    It was a good goal by a good player on form. Clive and Dominic would have you think he'd just won the World Cup by going over the top at Gallipoli.

    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeApr 2nd 2008
     
    Still, when was the last time Arsenal won the European Cup? Oh...
    I'm sure Tylds would get equally excited if that was ever to happen.
    • CommentAuthorandy
    • CommentTimeApr 2nd 2008
     
    That's a particularly moonfaced photo - who does it remind me of?
    • CommentAuthortosscat
    • CommentTimeApr 2nd 2008
     

    I know someone with a moonface.

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008 edited
     

    Clive, I sense your bedroom is full of Ronaldo posters and sticky tissues. This is disappointing for my perception of our forum membership.

    Wasn't Sophie Ellis-Bexter once famously referred to as a moonface?

    • CommentAuthorPoxy
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008
     
    My favourite description of SE-B was that she looks like she's trying to hide a coat hanger in her mouth.
    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008
     
    I think someone should create a hybrid of Sophie and Shirley Manson from Garbage.

    @David, chin up. There's always the second leg.
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008
     
    SE-B has a face like a rhomboid
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008
     

    Best examples of moonfaces:

    Cameron

    Bloke from Keane

    P.S. Spot the difference!

    • CommentAuthorgroli
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008
     
    personal preference is for Plateface, in fact may change my sign in to that
    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2008 edited
     

    moon

    "I am the moon, Ronaldo is a very very brave boy. I love him and his friend Rooney who has won us many World Cups. I have them on my bedroom walls. Yes."

    • CommentAuthorhooofck
    • CommentTimeApr 4th 2008
     
    Brilliant! Top stuff David.
    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeApr 6th 2008
     
    Goal!
    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 6th 2008
     

    Two Goals! Clive's lover boy upstaged. Brave, brave player that Alves.

    • CommentAuthordominic
    • CommentTimeApr 6th 2008
     
    haha - indeed. thing is, ronaldo is a smug prick. as was/is theirry henry.
    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeApr 24th 2008
     

    ha ha ha

    I would post a link to the clip on You Tube but I don't know how.

    There's a lovely picture of him with his head in his hands on the front of the Times website though:

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/

    • CommentAuthorandy
    • CommentTimeApr 24th 2008
     

    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeApr 24th 2008
     

    oooh, lovely, Liz - that's made my morning.

    I think I loathe him more than any other player ever. Including Robbie Savage and Roy Keane.

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 24th 2008 edited
     

    He's a brave player mind. The amount of plastics in the Fullback was quite alarming last night. My solitary laugh at this moment rang around the student hall.

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 24th 2008
     
    I wish we had RTE's coverage after games here:



    "He's a disgrace, he's a cod" - from about 2.30 onwards they slate the boy to the extent even I thought it was a bit much. The Lineker/Hanson smug combo doesn't come near this.
    • CommentAuthorShaunG
    • CommentTimeApr 25th 2008
     
    Eamonn Dunphy would almost persuade me to like Ronaldo - he's a professional controversialist who makes his living out of going over the top with his opinions on players and everything else.

    But does anyone dislike Man U enough to be rooting for Chelsea this weekend?
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeApr 25th 2008
     

    Oh yes, and how. Although I'm not going to enjoy it. I don't hate Chelsea nearly as much as I used to under Mourinho. In fact, I quite like Avram Grant.

    • CommentAuthorandy
    • CommentTimeApr 25th 2008
     

    I just don't care which multinational consumer brand wins.

    It's like asking me to get excited about Mastercard versus Visa.

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 25th 2008 edited
     

    I've never heard this phrase "He's a cod" before. What does this mean? That Ronaldo is over fished and in trouble of disappearing for good? Surely Eamonn would be happy about that?

    • CommentAuthorShaunG
    • CommentTimeApr 25th 2008
     
    Irish word pretty much the same as "con". Bizarrely turned up during the (I think) Jonathan Aitken scandal, when there was much debate in the Guardian about a "cod fax", which just sounds messy.
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeApr 27th 2008 edited
     
    Will you look at the state of his hair.

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/7370319.stm
    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeApr 28th 2008
     

    Cod

    • CommentAuthorsophie
    • CommentTimeApr 29th 2008
     
    still attractive but i really can't work out why. i don't know if it's the leather jacket, or that even the fish has a bit of a cocky face on. or maybe it's just the presence of my most despised man in the world in the photo as well. probably chewing gum.
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMay 21st 2008
     
    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!!
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMay 21st 2008
     
    Oh, they won anyway. Never mind.
    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     
    Yes, but we still got to see him cry. And Collossal John Terry too. Even Le Sulk. For a final full of far too many wankers that was never going to end with both teams losing I thought we got our money's worth. Short of a couple of career ending injuries I'm happy.
    • CommentAuthorjandb
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     

    Short of a couple of career ending injuries I'm happy.

    Never really understood people who say stuff like that

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008 edited
     
    Lighten up jandb. Its the world of fantasy. if it was considered OK for Eduardo to have his foot snapped off because the tackle wasn't meant, I think I can joke a little about something that never happened.
    • CommentAuthorjandb
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     

    Never really understood people who say stuff like that - and then try to justify it

    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     
    I can live with that. Unsubscribe already.
    • CommentAuthortosscat
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     

    :o

    • CommentAuthorGlyn
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     
    Can't we just live in a world of peace and respect where no-one really wants to break/remove the limbs of silky European/Brazilian tricksters whether they pay for the reds, or indeed, the reds.

    Surely we can all be united instead in the joyous action of John Terry hitting the post and that.

    Amen.
    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMay 22nd 2008
     
    Boring.

    I wanted them all to be horribly hurt, or disgraced. I can't stand this love to all men and the joy of football nonsense.
    • CommentAuthorjandb
    • CommentTimeMay 23rd 2008
     

    Nice.

    • CommentAuthorandy
    • CommentTimeMay 23rd 2008
     

    • CommentAuthorLiz
    • CommentTimeMay 23rd 2008
     

    @ Colette - thanks for reviving the thread. Have been absent due to work for the last couple of days, but suffice to say that Ronaldo missing his pen was the only drop of joy I got out of Wednesday night. Luckily for me, as it turned out, I was in a pub with no TV so we listened to the shoot out on my radio, and I was spared the sight of Alex Ferguson doing his gnomic dance of joy.

    • CommentAuthorColette
    • CommentTimeMay 23rd 2008
     
    @ Liz: "gnomic dance of joy" - absolutely brilliant - well done!
    • CommentAuthorkatiejane
    • CommentTimeMay 26th 2008
     
    @ jandb - it's David - he's cumudgeonly. And a sulky gooner who's smarting from Arsenal not winning sweet FA (no pun intended) for - errr - a long time.
    • CommentAuthorDavid
    • CommentTimeMay 26th 2008
     

    that's right katiejane, we not won nuffin', init.

    • CommentAuthorjandb
    • CommentTimeMay 27th 2008
     

    @katiejane - Don't worry, I've sent him a limited edition Smiths boxed set to cheer him up and keep him occupied during the summer months.

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