Seems OK - eerily quiet though.

Surely for a day to be miserable you need the majority of people to be miserable. I thought the majority usually ended up happy after a day of voting.

That said, I only know one pro-Tory person. Where are they all coming from?

I'm miserable

@David - For that to be true, the majority of people have to vote. Voter turnout is estimated to be 45%, which is actually pretty high for this country.

I am unashamed to admit that I was one of the 55% who did not vote. Having lived under Soviet communism, where elections were (and still are) a sham, I refuse to vote for a lesser of evils. I am very uncomfortable with the idea of voting for Boris, but I would rather slit my wrists than support Ken. Ken has a polarising effect on the city. Someone asked me once if I thought that Ken is antisemitic. I don't think that he is, but I do think that he believes that hinting at the fact helps him get the Muslim vote. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, but I'm certain that he's considered it. I've met this man. He's that kind of a scumbag. I will never put a cross by his name.

Boris, on the other hand, would be a disaster. So how does a girl choose?

I'm not voting in the US election, either, but that's more because I don't feel like I should have a say in the matter. I may have a US passport, but I haven't lived there in 7 years.

I refuse to vote for a lesser of evils

In that case, you'll never vote. It's like the end of 'Some like it hot', "Nobody's perfect!"

Voting and democracy doesn't lend itself to intellectually pure idealistic positions. It lends itself to Ken v Boris. You either make compromises or you don't play.

But if you don't play, you can't complain.

Also, whilst it is among his policies, he won't be able to bring back Routemasters for two reasons:

i) they're too expensive ii) no-one will build them for him, because the insurance liability for falling off them is so high iii) it'd be a total waste of money to retire all the existing fleet.

So apart from price, supply and implementation, it's brilliant.

If you want to moan about an imaginary policy not being fulfilled by a politician elected in an election you didn't vote in, go right ahead.

You can moan about other imaginary campaign failures if you like, like Romano Prodi's failure to reintroduce unicorns to Regent's Park, or Sarkozy's inability to train rhinos to fly helicopters.

Not sure it'll do much good though.

@Andy - I don't think that's true. I've voted in the past for candidates who weren't perfect, but who did not make me as disgusted as these two. You don't need to be in love with the candidate, but nor should you be embarrassed to support him.

As for the assembly, I honestly don't know anything about any of the candidates. It's my fault entirely, but it really would've been a complete stab in the dark. And that's not what voting is about.

It's really frightening how ignorant most voters are. Every time I hear someone say that the NHS if funded with NI contributions, I want to put a big "too stupid to vote" sigh on their forehead. I was watching a programme the other day about the outcry re not getting a referendum on the EU constitution. Fine, let's have a referendum. But before a person is allowed to vote, they should be tested on the content of the document in question. If you can't be arsed to read it, then you shouldn't get the chance to vote on it.

But you're right about complaining. I did not vote, so I shouldn't complain when Boris fucks up.

Brilliant. Does this mean I can complain about the lack of inner city monkey holding facilities?

@ David - if you make your way to City Hall - I'm sure Boris would let you cuddle him for a few minutes.

I vaguely remember a time when people owned monkeys as pets. Whatever happened to those people? Or, more importantly, those monkeys...

I would absolutely support any candidate that proposed a monkey-related policy. But before they're allowed to vote, people should have to explain the difference between monkeys and apes.

@David - So, basically you pay £150 to clean up monkey poo for a day? Oh, and you get a t-shirt.

Wasn't there a post on here once that started "back in the 70s my dad won a monkey in a poker game" or am I completely losing it?

And so we have gone from elections to monkeys.

Yakult. Pah. Orangutans go fishing with sharpened sticks

@collette @andy The code for London is 020. Just 020. Try dialling a friend in London but not dialling the 020. Whatever the next number was you will still reach them.

Some phone numbers start with a 8, some with a 7, some with a 3, but they could start with a 1-9 and it wouldn't matter. They would all still have the trunk code 020. There is no such thing as the (0208) area, nor do London numbers starting with 7 (such as mine) have any relevance to the geography. There. That's got that off my chest.

to add to the monkey discussion:

@David - there are monkeys that you can have as pets - capuchins and marmosets are the main ones I think! Not very nice for the monkey though - they need constant attention, even more than Plum!

@andy - gibbons are apes.

That wikipedia article is written in such an indignant tone. I love the phrase 'incorrectly placed pauses'. I imagine it was written by Moss from the IT crowd.

Numerous examples of incorrectly formatted telephone numbers may still be seen in and around London, including signwriting on shopfronts and commercial vehicles, and in newspaper advertisements. The incorrectly-placed pauses are also heard in speech everywhere: in radio and television advertisements, and said by office workers misquoting their office numbers as "0207 ... ...." - unaware that this simply perpetuates the confusion.

Everyone in London who incorrectly pauses between the fourth and fifth numbers of their phone number is an idiot and shouldn't be allowed to vote.

I mean, an incorrect pause! How stupid are some people?

The pause should correctly come after the second 0.

Morons.I mean I ask you.

@colette - just glad to give you the chance to patronise.

Aristotle never incorrectly paused when giving out his phone number. He did once say "PIN number" and was never forgiven by the editors of greekipedia.

He voted GreekIP, then Boris with his second preference.

oh god. i can't believe this is actually happening.

I can't find a nice coloured in map anywhere for the Mayoral results, but looking at the BBC site, it's not even so much inner/outer London as affluent/less affluent London. The boroughs where Ken won form a sort of diagonal line from North to South East London - Enfield and Haringey, North East, City and East, Lambeth and Southwark and Greenwich and Lewisham. The other constituency which elected Ken was Brent and Harrow, for obvious reasons.

Grrr. Now I'm torn - part of me hopes he massively fucks it up, so casting doubt on the Tories ability to run things effectively, but then I'm not sure how much I'm personally prepared to suffer for the cause - I think I'm more pro-London than pro-Labour.

If you look at the results for Bexley & Bromley, they voted for Boris in such numbers as to almost account for Boris's overall winning margin. So if we find ourselves suffering (though I suspect he may just turn into a non-event with little noticeable impact) we know who to blame.

(I realise I'm opening myself up now for this thread to turn into attacks on split infinitives...)